Disney called, they want their mistake back

Guess what? Phil won't be the only new face at the Parentopia Passover Seder this year. Craig Dezern from Disney has also scored himself an invite. Craig, who oversees PR for the Disney Parks, responded to an email we sent to Disney regarding the blogger event scheduled on Passover.

Craig did exactly what we would expect from a stand-up guy working with a company that understands a terrible and unfortunate mistake was made. Craig offered a no-excuse apology from Disney for their failure to check the date and realize they had planned an event on Passover. He said it was wrong, he said it was accidental and he said he was very sorry. We accept his apology, we accept Disney's apology.


PR folks, we understand screw ups happen. We're all human. But when the mistakes happen take responsibility, apologize wherever necessary, educate yourself or those responsible for the error so it hopefully will not be repeated, perform an act of contrition if warranted, and then move on.

This is exactly what Craig is doing at Disney. Craig will be meeting with his PR team and reinforcing with them calenders must be checked and there is no excuse not to check a calender. It is a simple, and obvious, thing to do when planning an event. Period. Craig also told Devra apologies will also be extended to those bloggers whom had been invited to the event and had to decline due to the event being scheduled on Passover. It is our understanding those bloggers will be invited to a future Disney event.

Learn from Craig and the way he handled the situation, notice he did not offer even one excuse, not one backpedal applied. Not even and inkling of, "We're sorry, but..." He kept it simple; An apology and a promise to do better next time.

And that,to quote a former Mouseketeer,is exactly "What a girl wants, what a girl needs..." and makes us happy.

How I Didn't Pass Over Easter

Last night we were driving home from our Spring Break break. The Huz and I were discussing the entire Disney Debacle, as it is known in our household. Son Two was fast asleep, but Son One (our 12 year old) was listening in on our discussion and occasionally interjecting his own ideas/comments. During the course of our car-based convo about Easter and Passover observances, The Huz, responding to Son One's question "Do Jews ever do anything for Easter?" answered, "Yes, your mother was once the Easter Bunny!" Naturally this newly discovered tidbit about mom surprised Son One.

It's not a deep dark secret. It's true, during the Gulf War, I was in fact the Easter Bunny.

It's one of those "Before we had kids..." stories. (Which, by the way, most kids really enjoy hearing because it gives them perspective that their parents have other roles in addition to being mom and/or dad.) I wish I had the picture to post, but it would take me until next Passover to dig up the photo since it isn't a digital one. So you'll just have to make due with the retelling of the tale (tail?!) as I told Son One last night:

During the Gulf War, Daddy and I lived in Louisiana. Daddy was assigned to an Air Refueling Squadon at Barksdale Air Force Base. You weren't born yet. During our first year of marriage, Daddy was deployed 11 of those twelve months. One day while Daddy was away, I picked up the ringing phone and on the other end was the wife of Daddy's squadron commander, Ann.

"Hi Devra, all is okay, Pete is fine, I'm calling to ask for a favor." You see, back then, we all prefaced our calls to one another with "all is okay, husband/wife is fine" because sadly, a call from the Base always made our hearts skip a beat because it could mean the difference between knowing your loved one is coming home and life as it were continuing, or knowing your dreams of the future were ending because your loved one has been wounded or killed. That is the reality of war. Your dad and I lived that reality every day during the Gulf War and during Kosovo you lived it too when Daddy was deployed for all those months.

Do you remember sitting in our backyard in Kansas and looking up in the sky as we both heard a KC-135 fly overhead and you pointed upward? Do you remember what you called those planes as they flew over our house? Son One answered, "I called it a Sky Daddy." Yup, that's it alright. So you see, this a lot like the reality many families are currently facing with the war in Iraq and Afghanistan. It is a chilling reality our family understands too. We've talked about it a lot, so you know what empathy means; understanding we're all in this together. (cue the High school Musical soundtrack gentlemen!)

On other end of the line Ann is saying, "Devra, we are having an Easter Egg Hunt for the children in our squadron. Devra, would you please be our Easter Bunny?" I was quiet for a minute. Did I hear her right? I was being asked to be the squadron's Easter Bunny! Going thru my mind was,"Hello? I'm Jewish. I don't observe Easter", but maybe Ann had forgotten since The Huz is not Jewish? I gently reminded,"Ann you know I am Jewish, right?"

Ann responded that yes, she knew, and was asking me anyway. Huh?She then explained how when she was growing up she had once worked in a synagogue and everyone at that synagogue made her feel included, even though she was very openly Catholic. No one was trying to make her be Jewish, she understood that, they only wanted her to feel welcome too. Not feel excluded.

Ann went on to tell me she how she did briefly consider whether asking me to be the Easter Bunny would be offensive, but felt it more important to include me in a squadron event, than risk me feeling excluded from the event because I don't observe Easter. Ann told me it was more offensive to her not to ask. She explained her reasoning, "This is a time when we all need to be around one another. I know we're not all Catholic like me, we're not all Jewish like you, but I also know are all people who care about each other deeply. I don't want anyone isolated or excluded for any reason. If I need to figure out a way to include everyone, I am going to make it happen. I hope you will be our bunny." (and if you are reading this and tears are falling? Me too.)

Ann then told me she thought I would be "such a wonderful bunny", sharing how she had observed me with the squadron children at Hail and Farewells, and felt "your personality is perfect to be the Easter Bunny, we need someone to be upbeat and someone who could really play with the kids and get them to participate. Distract us all from the worry for a while." Something,she said, our squadron really needed as much as possible, given the stress the war is putting on everyone's family. The kids were indeed having a hard time. War is, after all, hell.

Ann wasn't at all surprised by my answer, "Ann, of course I will be the Easter Bunny. What time do you need me to be there?" After I hung up the phone, I went digging in our closet for Daddy's size 14 White Nike Hi Top's which I knew would make the perfect rabbit feet.

You see, my first thought wasn't,"I can't believe they're even having an Easter egg hunt in the first place when they know not everyone celebrates." No, my first thought was, "It must be so difficult for these families-my Air Force family of friends-to be observing their special holiday without their loved ones and since this isn't my holiday, why not be their Easter bunny?" Why not let them have their holiday, after all no one was denying me Passover by including me in Easter.



I also thought that if agree to be the Easter Bunny, this means all of the families observing Easter would be able play and laugh with their children, enjoying a common tradition, as they ran around the Barksdale Visitor Center looking for eggs and giggling like crazy. While it may not have been *my* tradition, it was theirs, and I wanted to be there with them and help them have it.


And then I stopped in my bunny tracks as it hit me that I meant enough to them, they wanted me to be there too! And that,Son One, is how mommy was once the Easter Bunny.



It is also known as the story of, "How a nice Jewish girl like me, wound up in an Easter Bunny costume like that."



The take away from this? It is better to include somebunny than exclude somebunny. All it requires is a little thinking outside the bun.

Oy Vey they did it again (Update with Weber-Shandwick apology)

We are pleased to report that within hours of our post, we received this apology from Phil at Weber-Shandwick:

Dear Aviva and Devra,
I just read your response to the recipes that I sent to you yesterday. I sincerely apologize, especially if I offended you. Thank you for calling this out to me– lesson learned in paying close attention to the details. I will certainly be more conscious about the content of what I send to you in the future.
Sincerely,
Phil

We responded to Phil by accepting his apology and we also let him know that our calling him out was done in an effort to raise awareness and not to offend him either. He responded by letting us know he wasn't offended in the least, and needed to learn to do better. Phil, dawg, you have scored an invite to the Parentopia Passover Seder. Mazel Tov!

As for Disney? We are not aware of any formal apology having been extended by Disney to Jewish mommy bloggers. Hopefully they aren't Mickey Mousing around and are working on getting one out immediately. But maybe they can't do it on their own, maybe they need some more help from us. If this is the case, Devra has penned yet another brief open letter. If you want to sing along while reading, go for it:

Dear Disney PR,
Disney, let me introduce you to Phil from Weber-Shandwick. Maybe he will help you write that apology? Phil knows how to make one.
Wishing you well,
Devra

PS: School is in session over here, here and here if anyone needs to attend a couple of classes about how to market to mommy bloggers.

Oy Vey, they did it again.

We hope corporations are paying attention to the mistakes made when Social Media outreach folks either are oblivious as to how communication should be managed or don't take the time to learn about the consumers they are trying to woo. These two recent gaffes left us shaking our collective head.

Aviva received this email from Phil from Weber Shandwick,

Hi Aviva,

I thought you might be interested in these recipes to add a little variety to your Easter morning brunch from Eggland’s Best. After the egg hunts and visits from the Easter Bunny are over, gather the family around the table and enjoy these tasty meals. Also remember, EB feeds their hens all-natural, vegetarian ingredients, so they are healthier than ordinary eggs.

There are also other great brunch ideas available at http://www.egglandsbest.com/recipes/recipelist.asp?catno=1&pg=recipe.

Hope you enjoy these recipes. Feel free to share them with your readers if you like.

Happy Easter!

Phil

Well Phil - Thanks for the links and the two recipes you included in your email. Believe me, having Easter morning brunch at all would definitely "add a little variety" to our family's weekend plans. You see Phil, if you had bothered to read anything on my blog or website you would have noticed references to the fact that I am Jewish. Phil, if you didn't get the memo, Jews don't observe Easter. We observe Passover.

Phil, dawg, don't be too hard on yourself. Maybe you just need a better office calender. But you are in fine company. We recently learned of an event scheduled by Disney in April. Devra has penned a brief open letter:

Dear Disney PR Team,
While it is lovely for you to plan an event for mommy bloggers, your event is taking place April 18-20th during Passover.
Human Resources called, they want their diversity training back.
Wishing you well,
Devra

Weber Shandwick and Disney why don't you read this, this and this. Oh and bookmark this. We're all about embracing imperfection at Parentopia. Fully understand oversights occur, we know mistakes get made, despite the best of intentions. Just learn from them, okay?

When siblings handle their own rivalry. It can happen without blood and tears!

I was just over at Goon Squad Sarah's blog and this post reminded me of a battle I once witnessed between a 7 year old brother and his 14 year old sister.

Brother: You ate all the Oreos, you poopyhead.
Sister: Well, you come from a used womb. So there!

Ed & Me or How my mind is changing about General Motors

I promised last month that all would be revealed about my trip to ChiTown in a future post.

The future is now...

The email subject was "An Opportunity...the Chicago Auto Show" and I almost deleted it.

Why would I do such a thing? Well, every day Aviva and I open our email and read requests from individuals or companies asking us to mention their product, program or service on our site. They tell us "your readers want to know...." Then there are some who blatantly kiss our collective tush by calling us "influencers" and those are the ones that seem to scream "delete me!" and we often do. It's not that we discount the value of being taken seriously, it's just that the term "influencer" has become That Word.

We already understand we are recognized experts because we've worked that same collective tush off in order to become respected, trusted and Internationally recognized online and in real life, as they say it. The fact is we're not going to take that same collective tush and put it on the line for just anyone or just anything. After all, there is a big difference between being a resource and being a mouthpiece. N'est-ce pas?

What Aviva and I have together is called a "powerful platform" and ours was built not by a book publisher or a hired publicist. Our street cred is the result of dogged determination belonging to none other than Aviva and me. It's given us the power to take on the world advocating the joys of parenthood on our terms. We want to bring to you the best of what we know, see and do. Honestly, and with integrity. Period.

We use this power for good. Everyone's good, not just our own. We subscribe to the idea "Power is the ability to do good things for others." It was with this in mind I accepted the invitation from General Motors to attend the Chicago Auto Show. Was I in the mood to drink corporate Kool-aid and sell it myself? No. I actually liked the way I was approached. No expectation on GM's part that I was putting my glass out to be filled and no demand from them that I pony up some kind of positive promotion for them. No special agreements, no promises on anyone's part.

I've already blogged about the great party I attended at House of Blues. You already know I am a maniac on the dance scene when given the tiniest bit of encouragement. Nothing new there.

What you don't know about is the dinner I attended with the General Manager of Chevrolet, Ed Peper. (That's Kim and Me towering over Ed in the pic, btw.)Before you get up in my grill about selling you a car, that isn't what dinner was all about for me. Sure, the team discussed their new family crossover suv, which was certainly expected, but it was the unexpected which gave me insight GM has made changes since Roger & Me. Starting with General Manager Ed Peper and the team he had with him from Chevy.

You know what Ed told us at dinner? He's a dad with guilt. Yup, he admitted it right there at the table. In front of everyone, "I have tremendous daddy guilt." Ed travels a lot, he is dad to an infant who doesn't stop growing while dad is away on business trips. Ed feels the pull to be home, yet knows he has job responsibilities and employees to take care of as well. Fair enough to say this isn't exactly news, but I don't know all that many folks who used to be in Ed's corporate position Back In The Day who would discuss that fact at a business dinner. This was my first experience with radical transparency. And it was damn refreshing.

Not only did Ed's admission bring a new level of humanity to a business meeting, it also paved the way to discuss the difference between that which is concierge service and that which is true family benefit offered across the entire employee spectrum; from workers on the assembly line all the way up to absolving Ed of his daddy guilt. Ed was listening, his team was listening to Ed and I think everyone came away from that dinner feeling a little bit surprised, but in a really good way.

I am going to keep track and see what happens next because GM seems to be trying to figure out how to not only provide a new vehicle that will take consumer families where they need to go, but try new ways to go where their own corporation's families need them to be. I'm heading to Spring Hill TN in a couple of days to visit the plant where the Traverse will be made. Look for another post about that soon.

PBS Parents Q&A Launched! We say hey, what a wonderful kind of day!

PBS programming has always been a big part of our lives; During our own childhood, in the course of our parenting, and now as professionals. We are so excited to be featured experts on PBS Parents this month! We hope you will click on over, check out the Q&A and participate in the discussion about what spikes or decreases your guilt-o-meter.

Devra makes it no secret that if Calliou , Arthur and Clifford were of age (and in the case of Arthur and Clifford, human), she'd take them all out and buy 'em a round for each 30 minute increment they kept her sons contently occupied giving her the opportunity to take a shower...and leave the guilt.

Aviva says, "Roger(s) that!"

Everything Old is New Again: Header to Head Lice

We have a new header on our blog. We think it captures the feeling you will have when you find Parentopia. We'd like nothing more for you to lay back, relax and enjoy being with your family. There is much to be said for just plopping down on your back and staring up into the sky.

Even if it's only for a few minutes. Watching clouds go by, making up stories about the shapes you see. It's an activity that is absolutely free and one which can be enjoyed by people of all ages and stages. It can be a distraction for a tantruming child, or a way to occupy an older kid while you are taking a road trip. It's almost always an instant "ahhh" for an adult, where you can let the day's stress just float out of your body and up into the atmosphere.

Unless your kid has head lice, then there is nothing relaxing at all about that. We needed a transition sentence. Admittedly this one is terrible. Feel free to write your own and put it in our comments.

If you are dealing with lice, lice baby, check out "The Meaning of Lice" which was sent to us by Neil who thought we'd be interested in reading it . He was right. We love us some nice word play on Monty Python, whether that was his intention or not. We also appreciate Neil rummaging around our archive and letting us know our lousy post brought him to Parentopia.

The last time we wrote about head lice, our stats surged as we welcomed new Parentopians Googling:

do u feel lice on your face?
itchy head pre teen
parents complaining about headlice
child doesn t have lice but parent feels crawly itchy scalp
mom has lice
head lice make you feel lousy
invincible lice
my head really itches but i don t have head lice
can you get lice in a pool
lice eradication stuff
head lice amusing
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what percentage of parents know how to deal with head lice
can lice or nits fall out of your scalp onto your face

Feel free to offer up your own answers and/or information to any of the Googling. The searches will continue for a good 6 months to a year, so you have plenty of time to scratch your itch to respond.