She Dreamed a Dream

I know I'm a bit late on this. I'll be honest. I saw Susan Boyle's name and face flash on my screen well over a dozen times yesterday but, not being a reality TV fan (it's true, I'm not), I ignored it. Then, tonight I got an email from a friend of mine with a link to a You Tube video. It was Susan Boyle's audition for Britain's Got Talent. I've listened to it 5 times in the last half hour. It's playing right now in the background - can you hear it? Your loss if you can't. This is amazing!

Of course, after listening, I began to Google (Googling??). Susan Boyle's face, voice and story are everywhere. Overwhelmingly, people are saying the same thing: no name, homely looking, unemployed, 40-something year old woman amazes audience and judges. It's a wonderful story. I almost said it was also a sad story but the story isn't sad at all. The way people have decided to react to it though, is both mind boggling and heart breaking.

When I listened to her sing, my first reaction was, "Holy shit. What an amazing voice!" It was most definitely NOT, "Wow, she sure can sing for an old, ugly woman." You see, I sing (nothing like Susan or Elaine Paige of course). And, I am not a tall, thin, young, milky complexioned beauty. I am a short, need to lose 15 pounds, 40-something (barely), mother of 3. When I walk out onto a stage though, I am anyone and anything I care to be at that moment. I do my best to set aside thoughts of those few extra pounds or the lovely chin "blemish" that just had to appear on opening night. I put all my energy into performing my heart out and I hope that is what the audience sees.

I think the most heart breaking part of watching the videos and reading the stories about Susan Boyle is that, while she probably never thought of herself as a beauty queen, she does not need the focus of her performance to be all the reasons she should have failed. The fact is, the woman can sing! Why is there a need to point out the faults as reasons for amazement instead of just saying, "WOW! That was amazing. You have an incredible voice and I am honored to be part of letting the whole world know about you."

The most beautiful part of this story: When asked where she got the courage to go out and do this, Susan responded it was to fulfill a wish for her mother. I have no doubt she has fulfilled the wish several times over for her mother and for people everywhere. People who do not live the glamorous life. An article found in The Herald describes Susan in words all too familiar to those of us who spend time caring for others. It speaks of those of us who gradually set aside our exercise routines, tidy wardrobes, and make-up and replace them with practical clothes and a few extra pounds.

Could this description fit that of a mother? Why yes, I do believe I've been known to represent that. This is not necessarily all bad. It just means we selflessly put others needs above our own.

While living selflessly may be a reputable trait, we should be able to do it without losing sight of ourselves. I believe it is perfectly OK to be selfish every once in a while because it refuels us. If we only give, give, give, we may eventually run out... of energy, of desire, of time. I am so proud of Susan for having the courage to perform and I am humbled by her story. I believe she can, should and will serve as a reminder to mothers and others to chase our dreams, follow our hearts, and live for the thrill and happiness we all deserve in our lives no matter what we look like, how we spend our days, or how others perceive us.

Please, please, please don't let this all turn out to be a scam to boost ratings!